Choose Compassion Videos - SCC Global Outreach

Choose Compassion Videos - SCC Global Outreach

Lazy Cook: Fake it Till You Make it Red Lentil Dahl

The frugal lazy cook is back in the kitchen. I visited the new Whole Foods recently to make myself feel healthier without any effort. I walked out with a 'bulk' purchase of red lentils because a friend had told me it was both healthy and yummy.

The frugal cook in me was stoked to buy about 3 cups of dried lentils for less than $3. The lazy cook was shocked at the easy instructions (3 cups liquid to 1 cup lentils, bring to boil and simmer for 30-45 minutes). Geez, how easy and cheap is that?!

Then I looked in my fridge and found all sorts of goodies that seemed to go together. I didn't have any real plan just the guidelines for cooking the lentils. So here is my first ever attempt at making dahl (a lentil stew with onions from South Asia). Note: Like most of my recipes use whatever you have on hand. The only important step that can't change is 3 cups liquid to 1 cup lentils.

I love red curry paste and coconut milk.
Hoping it is yummy with these lentils and leeks.

Ingredients:
1 leek thinly sliced or chopped
1 small sweet onion thinly sliced
1/2 to whole sweet pepper (I used yellow) sliced or chopped
2 large carrots thinly sliced
3-5 teaspoons red curry paste
1 cup red lentils
1 can coconut milk
~2 cups broth (combine with coconut milk and add enough broth to equal 3 cups liquid), I used chicken broth I made and froze from a rotisserie chicken  but vegetable would be tasty too.
2 cups fresh spinach (or thawed package of frozen spinach)

Step 1:
Sauté carrots, sweet onion, leeks, yellow pepper, garlic in coconut oil.

Step 2:

This is what it looks like once you add the liquid.

After 3-5 minutes add 2-3 teaspoons red curry paste to pan and toss to coat veggies. Sauté 2 minutes or until the curry aroma starts to rise from the pan.

Step 3:
Add 3 cups liquid, 1 cup red lentils and season with Himalayan pink salt to taste. Cover and bring to boil then simmer about 35-45** minutes until lentils are soft (they will burst like split peas in split pea soup). I followed the directions from the bulk dispenser at World Market to know how to cook the lentils. Add more curry paste to taste a teaspoon at a time if you want a stronger flavor.



Add two handfuls of fresh spinach and let it wilt then stir.

Step 4:
**About 10 minutes to go add spinach and stir in so it wilts.

Step 5:
Serve over pungent Jasmine or Basmati rice.










The Verdict:
When asked if I should make it again my husband said, "Yes. Next time add grilled chicken."  Then I informed him this was my attempt to come up with a satisfying 'meatless' meal so we could try to be like those healthy people we envy who practice a weekly meatless meal. He was only mildly disappointed and said, "I'm okay with that."

Moving Stones: I think my child has a learning disability, what now? Tips and answers from a mom who's been there.

This series of Moving Stones is about getting the stones that litter our field out of the way so our children can grow. Sometimes those stones are learning disabilities and attention differences. These stones can appear to be boulders but with the right tools they can be reduced to pebbles. Here are some questions I'm often asked and resources I've used to help my own and other students.

Disclaimer: These are my opinions. I am not an expert, just a mom who has 3 children with  either Asperger's, learning or attention differences. These opinions are based on what worked for my family and meant to encourage you to find the resources that will work for your family.

Should I have my child tested/diagnosed?
Yes. It's very hard to help our children if we don't have the proper diagnosis. When my son was 7 we had him diagnosed by a child psychologist but the diagnosis was inaccurate. We did not receive the proper diagnosis until he was 10. Those 3 years with the wrong diagnosis meant we were only treating symptoms of the problem and not the source. We made some progress during this time but other things became worse. Once we identified the source of his problems we were able to help him more effectively and began to make real progress.

I home school so I already make accommodations for her, why do I need a diagnosis?
A diagnosis is necessary for a child or an adult to receive the rights afforded to them by the Americans with Disabilities Act.  Your child will not always be at home. If your child is going to go to college or technical school they may need accommodations but if they don't have a diagnosis they may not be entitled to it. Want them to receive special accommodations for the SAT like a test reader or no time limit? You need a documented disability. If your college student needs to have a special test environment they need a diagnosis to get what they need from the college. Without a diagnosis the college does not have to give them what they need and depending on the professor, the school, their funding and resources they may not give it to your child. Which is better: having a tool and never needing it or not having the tool  when you need it?

How do I get my child diagnosed?
My first choice is a child psychologist and very often this is covered by health insurance under mental health coverage. If you are in the Savannah, Georgia area I recommend the Savannah Child Study Center.

• Contact your insurance provider to verify your coverage.
• Talk to other parents of special needs children to get referrals to a psychologist who has a good reputation for diagnosing learning disabilities. 
• Do some homework before you go. Learn about different learning difficulties and observe your own child's specific struggles so you can work with your psychologist to pin point where the glitch is happening.

I recommend Jill Dixon's The Homeschooler's Guide for Learning Problems- Practical Tips For Daily Success. She explains in easy to understand terms the different glitches and what is happening in the brain.  This will help you understand what the psychologist is saying and be able to work with them to come up with a plan to help your child.

She also has a great tool for Verifying Special Needs on her website.

Should I go to the school system to get my child diagnosed or for services?
That is a personal decision. Some homeschoolers are concerned about possible hostility or interference with their decision to home school if they use the public schools for a diagnosis or special needs services.

First it depends on your state because not every state will give these services to homeschoolers. I understand why people may be concerned and this is a decision only you can make for what is right for your family. Talk with other families in your community to see what the climate is like in your neighborhood school. In my community I have not heard of a home school family being 'visited' because they used the school system for special needs help. I've heard of some teachers not being supportive of homeschooling or not understanding why a family chooses that but I have not heard of harassment. I've also heard of wonderful special education teachers helping home school families. I believe it varies from teacher to teacher and school to school.

My opinion is this, if my child needs help then I will get them that help wherever I can get it from. I did not use the school system but I wish I had gotten my children help sooner.  Wisdom and caution are not the same thing as fear. My fear interfered with some of my decisions and a decision based on fear is often not the wisest decision.

I have a diagnosis, now what?



Don't let the simple cover fool you,
these guides transformed my home.

A frequent challenge is that a psychologist will give you a diagnosis but they may not tell you what to do with it to help your child. I bumbled around in the dark for a long time trying to find resources to help me help my kids and then I heard education consultant Jill Dixon speak. Everything changed for me and my ability to help my kids after I discovered her guides. They are easy to understand, not filled with fluff and give real suggestions to use with your child to help them learn!

These are my top 3 tools in my tool box for helping my special needs children:

• The Homeschooler's Guide for Learning Problems-Practical Tips for Daily Success
• The Homeschooler's Guide for Attentional Difficulties-Practical Tips for Daily Success
• The Concise Learning Styles Assessment with Instructional Guide

What other resources do you suggest?
Here are a few I've used with success AFTER I identified their learning style and learning glitch. Identifying these two things is, in my opinion, the most important first steps. Skipping these steps will only lead to frustration.  Below are just a few of the tips I've found in Jill Dixon's guides.  I don't include her tips for Visual Learners because most commonly used curriculum are already designed this way. Very often learning and attention differences are improved by using auditory and tactile approaches.

Note: Test yourself for your learning style also. I've observed that one of the leading factors in frustration between teacher and student is when the teacher has a different learning style than the student. We teach in the same way we learn. Teachers who learn to teach according to the styles of their students find positive results. 

Auditory Learners:

• Leap Frog Videos helped my daughter reinforce the symbol with the sound (she watched it EVERY day for months and months before she finally was able to make a solid connection).
• Alpha Phonics and Phonics Pathways were the most effective tools for my two dyslexic children. It emphasizes word families. AVKO Sequential Spelling is also good.
• Choral Reading is a method where the teacher/parent reads a passage aloud and then the child reads the passage aloud. At first I thought my son might have been reciting what I was saying and not reading but then I realized he really was reading.
• Use flash cards for reading and math- make sure they are saying them aloud. Use a timer with the math facts and keep a record of their time so they can see tangible proof of their improvement.  My daughter recognized her improvement was from regular practice and her regression was from neglecting daily math and not just me nagging.
• Increase reading comprehension by having children 'narrate' the story back to you (they tell you in their own words what they read or heard) or tell the story to their siblings.
• Audio books transformed my daughter's reading ability. The trick is to have them listen AND read along with  the hard copy. I talk more about this in my blog about cultivating a love of reading.

Tactile/Kinesthetic Learners:

• Use manipulatives to teach spelling, word families and math facts/concepts.
• Tactile learners benefit from stimulating their fingertips with different textures. An example of this would be to have them write words or math facts in a tray full of Jell-o mix or sand.
• Help memorize math facts, sight words or letters by pounding golf tees or tacks into a cork board labeled with words.
• Help reading comprehension by having child act out scenes from a story or use Legos to build a scene or characters from the story.
• Build math story problems with Legos or other manipulatives.

Reading Comprehension:
To improve reading comprehension it helps to separate the mechanics of reading from having to comprehend the story. I talk more about that here but the short version is dyslexics brains are wired differently and they must work harder than the average reader just to decode the symbols on a page let alone understand their complex meaning.


Acting out stories is fun &
helps  with comprehension.

• Read stories aloud or use auditory books while children play with legos, clay, paint, or other tactile stimulation.
• Pause to ask them questions about the story as you go.
• Read aloud comprehension questions BEFORE you read the story. Tell children to 'listen' for the answer as you go along. Younger students should only be asked to look for one or two questions at a time, ask questions as you go along through the story.
• Have children act out or draw scenes or thematic concepts from the story.

Encourage Story Telling & Creative Writing:
Read more about how this looks in my house here. By giving kids room to tell their own stories (and listening to them) you will encourage them to want to read other people's stories. Learning to write helps cultivate reading.

• We use Write With the Best because it breaks down the most important aspects of why good writing is good and it has a track record for successfully helping reluctant writers as well as special needs writers. (I've used both Volume 1 & 2, we've re-used them every year for the last 8 years.)
• Cultivate Vocabulary with Roots & Fruits. There are creative and fun reproducible worksheets to make vocabulary 3 dimensional and you can use this book every year (buy it once and your done!). My kids favorite is the Silly Sentence. My son picked a group of characters who he wrote silly sentences about every week using his weekly vocabulary words. The adventures of Alligator, Tiger, Koala and Ewok continue to be one of my favorite memories of home schooling  along with the continuing problems of my daughter's Elf labor union who fought regularly against the injustice of toy and cookie factories. We laughed and they learned.
• Creative writing is a right brain activity but the act of physically writing is left brain. I separated these two activities by having my children dictate their stories to me. This freed up their creative juices from the very difficult task of hand writing, spelling and reading. It built their confidence as writers and made them want to read. (I'm not an advocate of multi-tasking when it comes to learning, especially regarding special needs learners.)

The Best for Last.
Take a deep breath. Let it out. Remember to breath. Now relax. Your children need you to breath and relax. I mean it when I say that everything is going to be alright. Your children will not end up as hobos. You are actively pursuing help one step at a time which makes you the best advocate for your child. You don't have to do this by yourself.

I truly believe it is not my job as a parent to be the expert on everything or do everything myself. My job is to move stones so my children can grow.-









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Why Test & Study Skills are Important Or "Another one? Why do I have to take all these tests?"

 

I have been teaching other people's students for 10 years and I hear a lot of questions about tests (read: complaints).  Below are a few examples of those questions, my explanation to most of them and how we prepare you at Jill Dixon's Eclectic Academy of Learning to prepare for tests. (See specific information about tests at EAL further in this article- it's long but will answer most if not all of your questions about tests.)

 

Let me be clear, I do not believe tests are always an accurate indicator of mastery of a subject. The dominant test formats do not afford  the different learning modalities to show what every student may know about a subject. However, tests are the primary method for entrance and advancement in most colleges/careers and they are here to stay.  I've seen many intelligent students be able to communicate their extensive knowledge of a subject with oration or projects but they were terrible test takers and had to jump through hoops to try and enter college because their tests did not reflect what they knew. Students must learn how to prepare for and take tests. This doesn't come naturally to most students and some students succeed not because they were taught how to take tests but because their learning styles match the test format.

 

 

 

Calvin should practice study/test skills.

Identify Learning Style For Testing Advantage
I was a very good test taker in school primarily because my learning styles meshed well with the teaching styles of my teachers and with the most popular forms of test giving (ie- visual). I'm also a strong tactile and auditory learner so while I do have excellent note taking skills they also stick with me because I remember what I hear, what I physically experience (writing notes) and what I see.

 

 

 

I score almost evenly in all three learning styles but this is rare and a great advantage that most people do not have which reflects in their test taking. For auditory and tactile learners who must take visual tests it is akin to someone having to take a test in a language they don't read. It doesn't matter that I am an expert in 'The Art of Drinking Coffee' if the test is in Mandarin or Binary Code (two languages I have yet to master) I will probably fail.

 

Identify and Transform Challenges Into Strengths


Find  resources to help you
maximize your challenges!

So now you've realized your learning style doesn't jive with the test format but what about other challenges? I don't have learning disabilities (LD) but many of my students do and they have either embraced their differences by finding ways to cope and maximize these challenges or they throw in the towel. Please don't do that. People with LDs have a gift for thinking outside the box and approaching problem solving from a different perspective that is a strength! There are advantages to having LDs or attention differences. My ADD tendencies  can be an advantage when I get hyper focused on one thing I can become an expert on whatever I'm focusing on. I was also a procrastinator of the first order which didn't impact me as much in high school but knocked me upside the head when I entered college. I learned on my own how to take notes and how to prepare for a test. No one taught me and that was hard, I don't want you to go through that so please take what I share here to heart.

Two 'take aways': It's is imperative to 1) know your learning style so you can in put information into your brain the way you learn and 2) learn how to study and how to take all types of tests.

FAQs from my high school students:

Mrs. Heather, why don't we get study guides or review sheets for all of our tests? How come we take all these different tests? They are annoying and some of them are harder for me than others but I can't figure out why. And tests are stupid, I know this stuff when we talk about it in class but when you give me a test I can't put it on paper. You said tests don't always show mastery so what's the point? 

 

Answer:

Look at this home school graduate who has learned
how to study and prepare for college.
Doesn't he look happy because he listened to
Mrs. Heather and Miss Hannah?

The Eclectic Academy of Learning gives you a variety of test taking and test preparation experiences to mirror what you will likely experience in college. The more exposure you have to tests the more likely you will know how to interact with them in a successful way (note: this is why we expose even our youngest students to tests). The homework assignments have been designed to help you practice study and time management skills that can be applied to other subjects. Every year EAL alumni return to say how 'Mrs. Jill's Class' gave them the skills they need to succeed in college and that is true of both advanced students and students with learning differences**.

 

Prepare As You Go from Day 1
Your professors will employ a variety of testing styles that require different styles of test prep in college. Most WILL NOT give you a study guide but will give you a syllabus telling you what you will be responsible to know for the entire semester, when it is due and when tests are. Don't count on them to remind you, most won't.

It is the student's responsibility to own their educational journey and seek out the knowledge they need, not the teacher's or the parent's (who won't be there when you are in college) but yours. The sooner you learn this the better off you will be.

Part of test preparedness means preparing from the first time a topic is introduced which is often weeks before a test.

This is your brain when you cram.
See how everything is falling out?
That's not very helpful.

You do this by:

• taking notes in class
• completing assignments on time
• reviewing information from previous weeks (not just looking at the current week and waiting to cram past information in right before the test).
• doing assignments over several days to allow your brain to 'build pathways' instead of trying to do all of your work in one day and overwhelming your brain with information it can't hold; like a soaked sponge it will drip out.    

Know When Tests are Coming: Read the Weekly Assignment Sheet & Look Ahead!
Weekly assignment sheets tell you when the tests are and what material is covered. Look at the entire semester's course pack and make sure you know when tests are coming so you can prepare as you go.
Your assignment sheet always tells you where to find the information you need for all of your tests either by saying which topic it is (i.e. Literary Terms and the weeks covered) or where the test is (chapter in a book).

Study Guides: Make your own and study via your learning style
It is nice to have a study guide or a word bank to refer to but in college you will most likely need to create your own study guide (sometimes one will be provided for you at EAL but it is your responsibility to know what will be on the test so don't count on it).

At EAL we teach you to start this right from the beginning. For example, your weekly vocabulary words are placed in a notebook, spiral index cards or typed up and placed in a central location depending on your learning style.

Study Guides You Build Yourself at EAL & Types of Tests:
EAL uses different formats to reflect some of the tests you will need to take in college and career. Some tests will be multiple choice or short answer only (World History the Easy Way, SAT practice) or essay (SAT in class practice, government). Some will rely heavily on memorization (such as our matching tests). Some will require critical thinking (such as our word usage section on the vocabulary tests and history short answers). Many will require you to communicate your understanding of a subject (short answer tests/homework questions, essay assignments, class discussion/debates).

Here are some of the ways we help you "learn how to learn" by studying as you go.

Vocabulary notebook of roots and weekly words definitions (visual/tactile may illustrate meanings, auditory write silly sentences).
Test is matching roots from a word bank to definitions and identifying how vocabulary words are used in sentences.
Century Book with timeline and biography terms provided in handout at front of history course pack for the entire semester(visual/tactile may illustrate meanings, auditory should use Time Rhymes handed out in class).
Test is matching terms from a word bank to definitions and answering a short answer format question regarding significance of historical figures or events as discussed in class and in homework (see next section about this).
Idioms notebook where you write or type the definitions of idioms from Dictionary of Cultural Literacy(visual/tactile students may illustrate meanings).
Test is matching idioms from a word bank to definitions.
Authors and Lines notebook where you write or type from Dictionary of Cultural Literacy.
Test is auditory. Teacher will read aloud a definition and student will identify correct Author or Line from word bank.

If you keep up with this work weekly (as best you can) then you always have your study guide to go back to and review. You also need to  interact with that material the way you learn such as the ways I describe above and on your study guides using visual, auditory or tactile study methods.

When we learn we build pathways in our brain.  

Test Taking Trouble? If you struggle with test taking you MUST review your work frequently! Your brain is like a forest. When you learn you are creating walking paths of information. The more you walk on the path the clearer the path becomes. When you don't walk the path it becomes overgrown and you have to rebuild the path. Walk your paths at least weekly and possibly daily if you really struggle a lot. 10 minutes a day reviewing one or two of the subjects you must memorize will make  big difference. Try using online flashcards like Quizzlet. (See example of how a student kept up with weekly terms using quizzlet here.) It offers lots of different ways to review and self-test terms. And it's fun.

Other Tests Which Require You to Find What You Need to Know:
In college (and life) you have to seek out the information you need. Some tests in college will not be found in your text books but only from your notes in class. This is why we emphasize taking notes during the 'literary vocabulary' section of literature class and during discussion time with your literature and  history homework (to gather information for the short answer questions). There are four tests you take that fall in this category: Literature Vocabulary, Literary Analysis Terms, World History the Easy Way and American Government.

The  literary vocabulary(synonyms) and literary analysis terms are in your literature notebook homework under each week of Read With the Best *(Confused? See note at end)

Keeping up with weekly homework IS study preparation and you only need turn back to the designated week's homework to find your terms. If you don't keep up with this regularly (barring the occasional sick day) you will have a tougher time preparing for the test because you'll have to go back and do the work you should have done previously.

It is also why we teach you how to read books actively and engage non-fiction/fiction books with our reading guides (see front of literature course pack) that teach you how to take notes when you are reading.

Review your notes from class.
Note taking in class is very important preparation for college, career and test prep. This is done when we discuss the critical thinking questions from the literature and history homework. When your teachers or classmates say things you didn't include in your answers then you should write this on your homework in red pen (NOT pencil or blue/black pen). When your teacher is lecturing and writes things on the board or emphasizes something in discussion you should write it down on your homework. Review these notes to prepare for biography tests and to help you prepare for your writing assignments.

World History the Easy Way tests are multiple choice and short answer and taken when we finish reading a chapter. Test questions are selected directly from the end of chapter test. Use the tips below to learn how to read actively and recognize important information in a text book.

How to prepare:

• Photocopy the test and have it beside you while you read.
• Skim the questions before you read and look for the answers as you go. (auditory read aloud)
• Highlight the answers when you find them. (visual/tactile)
• Write out the test questions with the correct answer. (visual/tactile)
• Read aloud the test questions with the correct answer. (auditory)
• Read the summary at the end of the chapter, pay attention to key words in bold face.
• Review your short answer essay questions from the previous homework assignments.

American Government tests are usually multiple choice and sometimes essay tests. Multiple choice tests are usually open NOTE BOOK which means you may use your outlines and class notes to help you answer the tests. Occasionally they will be open text book. The questions require you to think critically and understand the concepts. They are not terms memorized or statements directly taken from the book. You have to think about the concept the question is asking and determine the answer using critical thinking and reasoning skills.

Tip: Review the concepts on the outline and teach someone or tell someone in your own words what those concepts are about and the impact they have had. If you can do that then you will be able to answer the questions on the test. 

Essay tests will  be done at home and require you to use your outlines, text book, current events articles and discussion notes from class.

So, the next time you ask yourself, "Why do I have to do this and why can't you make it easier for me, Mrs. Heather?", you know the answer.

 

At EAL we are far more concerned with teaching you the skills for success you will use the rest of your life than we are interested in making the moment easier for you.

 

So, from one recovering procrastinator to you, learn the discipline of time management now before you are paying thousands of dollars to a college and realize you might not have the necessary study, test and discipline skills necessary to succeed.

 

And, some day you'll thank me for it. Just remember to bring me a cup of coffee when you do!

 

 

Note: I hear consistently from EAL students who are enrolled in college how they have an advantage over their peers from traditional schools because they learned in EAL how to communicate with their professors, how to manage their time, how to research, how to communicate, how to start a project, how to work independently and manage their workload. While their peers stare at a syllabus and don't know where to start these EAL alumni recognize what is expected of them and what to do next. This message comes from both super star' students AND students who struggled through high school. In fact, just this year a recent graduate who had multiple learning disabilities and ADHD told me his college writing class was 'easy' because of Mrs. Jill's class. This is WHY we emphasize teaching you HOW to learn and not just what to learn.

Pictures of the Books Discussed in this blog:


EAL Course Packs contain this book.
 It can also be purchased at www.edudps.com,
 www.cbd.com or www.rainbowresources.com

 

EAL Course Packs contain this book.
It can be purchased at www.edudps.com,
www.cbd.com or www.rainbowresources.com

 



Used at EAL for World History Courses 1 & 2:
Ancient World and Medieval World

Used at EAL for  World History &
American History Courses:
Medieval World,
American History 1 & American History 2
 





Used at EAL for American Government 1 & 2

Used at EAL all years for World Literature,
British Literature, American Literature 1 & 2



* Read With the Best (RWTB) is the literature curriculum used at EAL written by Jill Dixon. It is not a separate book but is included in your course pack as a student in EAL. These are the literature worksheets and referred to as RWTB on your weekly assignment sheets.

**This blog has been updated and was previously part of the Moving Stones series. September 2014.

Moving Stones: Encouraging a love of reading in a stony field

There's an analogy missionary friends of mine use that I think applies to challenges that require a long term commitment without the encouragement of immediate gratification. They will tell you they are moving stones on the mission field so others may plant and harvest the field.

If you take a walk in the New England country side where I spent my adolescence you'll notice stone walls border fields and connect stands of trees. Centuries ago colonists looked at the stone covered fields and made a decision. They needed to eat. To eat they needed to grow food. To grow food they needed to move those stones. So they moved them, one at a time and built walls. As they would plow they would find more stones. When the weather turned cold and harsh the earth would push up more stones and the farmers would move those too. It was an on going process that was never quite finished but without moving the stones their attempts to grow food would be more difficult. Stones get in our way and we have to move them.

"I love to read! I want my child to love it too but he/she hates it. My child would rather (fill in the blank) and fights me whenever I say it's time for 'fun reading' time. What can I do to make them love reading?"

Well, first I don't think anyone can 'make' anyone love anything. Love is a choice, it is voluntary. As parents we can create an environment where that choice to love reading can be easier to make. When I say a love of reading I don't mean 'school reading'. I mean reading for pleasure, to explore the worlds that exist in books. Reading is my favorite past time but put a text book in front of me and even I will groan.



I grew up immersed in books and they provided an escape from the troubles of the home I grew up in. I assumed my own children would love books as much as I did as a child. And at first they did. We spent hours in the library and brought bags of books home to read aloud on the couch or in bed together. Then a funny thing happened. Two of  my three children started to 'hate' reading. How could this happen?! How could my children 'hate' reading? They loved listening to stories but they 'wouldn't' read on their own. While my second child taught himself to read by 'eavesdropping' during reading lessons with my oldest child his siblings were struggling. It took a long time before I realized they have dyslexia and reading for themselves was a truly painful experience. I didn't know what to do. There were stones in my field.

Fast forward 10 years. If you were able to ride in my mini-van, take a walk with my teenagers or hang out in our house you would hear all of them discussing elements of literature, themes of science fiction and social commentary found in media and making analogies of social issues and literature. How could this happen? If you listen to their language you'll hear post high school level vocabulary come from their mouths and you'll observe them making arguments using literary references. How do they know those things? Where did that vocabulary come from? My husband and I moved stones.

Here are some of the stones we moved and how we moved them.

Great Expectations:
I had to examine and evaluate my expectations of my children. Did my expectations come from a realistic place and match how my children were made? My faith tells me they were made on purpose by a creative God so if they have challenges there is a purpose that is grander than my immediate convenience and comfort level.  Maybe arriving at the goals of being able to witness life through story telling, an expansive vocabulary to enable effective communication and enhancing critical thinking could be accomplished in a different way. Maybe the 'how' of getting there was the stone that needed to be moved. Important note: My husband was incredibly supportive of me and trusted me to pursue teaching them in this way. His own educational experiences empowered me to take whatever time and methods were necessary. This was a long, hard process in a field filled with stones we hadn't even seen yet but he backed me up 100%. He became a stone mover and was not a stone. The end of our story would be very different if he had not trusted and supported me even in my place of weakness and insecurity.


The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes:

Parents are detectives who identify stones in the field.

I had to identify what stones were getting in the way of my children being able to access the stories I wanted them to fall in love with. That meant I needed to ask for help from people who knew more than me. I read Cynthia Tobias' The Way They Learn which helped me begin to identify learning styles but I still didn't feel I had a handle on how my kids learned and how I could teach them. Then I discovered Jill Dixon's The Concise Learning Styles Assessment and everything became clearer. Mrs. Dixon's* guide not only helped me understand how I learn (and teach) and how my kids learn but gave me real strategies to help them. That was a start but I also had to know how to help my dyslexic children and I was clueless. Then I ordered her The Homeschooler's Guide for Learning Problems and I finally had real solutions I could actually use to help my kids learn to read. All my children have ADD tendencies like their parents and that impacts how they learn as well. Later we would also discover my son has Asperger's Disorder which is another influence in how he learns.

Pride & Prejudice:
My pride and my prejudice were also stones I had to move out of my field. I had to ask for help when I couldn't teach my dyslexic children to read. That meant finding tutors to spend time with my son and daughter to do what I was having a hard time doing. I was too emotionally invested and my impatience would either erupt or simmer but either way it was palatable and undermined my children's confidence. Learning had always been easy for me and I felt at a loss to help my kids because I didn't understand how they experienced the world. It also meant I had to let go of my need to control everything in my children's life and the timetable of their life. We were broke so I had to be creative about getting what we needed. I turned to a type of bartering with other moms and home school teenagers who had a heart for my kids and experience with the stones that needed to be moved. Many churches, libraries and social support groups like the Salvation Army provide tutoring services for free. Contact your local teacher's college and see if there are students who need practical hours for their degrees who might be able to tutor at an affordable price or for bartering.

The Sound (not) the Fury:
Reading time had become a fury of fights and drama. As I learned more about dyslexia I began to understand why reading was (literally) painful for my kids. They hated reading for themselves but they loved to listen to stories, partly because the 'pain' of reading visually was removed and mainly because they were auditory learners so they were able to receive the information the way they learn. I separated the stones of practicing the mechanics of 'how to read' from the act of inputting the content of reading. Now that they are teenagers I don't read aloud as often but my daughter is an avid 'reader'. She listens to almost all of her books on audio recordings and reads along with the hard copy of the book. This has helped her mechanical reading ability soar. She still has trouble with reading but guess who has been chosen as the narrator in her class play....twice! She works harder than most of her peers just to do the basics. It takes her longer to read and write all of her homework but her character has blossomed under the pressure.  My son practices 'mechanical' reading with his tutor, his dad and me and we've chosen subjects he is interested in like nature and video games to practice. With both of them we discarded the visual methods of teaching reading and found great success with word families and choral_reading. They are also highly tactile and kinesthetic so using Jill Dixon's Roots & Fruits to help them with their vocabulary we focused on her suggested methods of drawing pictures and stories to remember words and creating silly sentences and stories to tell using their vocabulary words.

Write With the Best

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

I use similar methods to encourage their writing. For 8 years we've been using Jill Dixon's Write With the Best because it uses examples of good writing (from the classic literature I want them to be familiar with), breaks the 'elephant' of writing into bite sized pieces, and incorporates learning styles. Writing is left brain and mechanical while creative writing is a right brain activity. The mechanical part of writing was insanely difficult so I moved that stone out of the way by allowing my children to 'dictate' their stories to me. I write/type what they say and then later we go back and edit it. This is how 'real' writers  write. They don't 'edit' as they go. They spill out all the words onto paper so they don't lose their ideas by blocking them with the left brain activity of editing. Once all the creativity is out of the way they go back and edit, edit, edit. If it worked for Mark Twain and Shakespeare why wouldn't it work for my kids? My son has 'written' and created several in depth stories over the years that were born from his many hours walking around outside and acting them out in his own world of make believe. And I listen. I listen to my kids tell their stories, share their ideas about the world and I am present when they are ready to ask questions. All of this enhances an environment to express thoughts and ideas. And it often 'interrupts' my day and my 'lesson plan' but it has paid me back in dividends.

 

Every family is different just as everyone's field of stones is different. These are things that worked in my field with  my stones. And it took a long time. In fact, the field still has stones in it but we have more walls and more planting space then we did before. The field is fertile and it is yielding what will become a bountiful harvest. My job as a parent is not to be the expert on everything or do everything myself. My job is to move stones so my children can grow.

Some famous people with dyslexia, ADHD, Asperger's and/or Autism



*I used Jill Dixon's materials before I met her. I heard her speak at a home school support group meeting when I was in a dark hole and was convinced my children would end up as hobos and it would be all my fault. I left that night with hope. Then my second son joined her class at Jill Dixon's Eclectic Academy of Learning in Savannah, GA when he was 8 years old. Later she asked me to be her history teacher and over time I have re-developed and written the history program used at the Eclectic Academy of Learning. I am currently the director of an EAL campus and use all the tools she taught me with her books and guides every day with my own children and many others.

Why Algebra? A non-math teacher's take on it.

To my students who say, "Why do I need math? It's not like I'll ever use it?"

The short answer, 'Yes you will, even algebra.' The longer answer is not learning math (and I mean truly understanding it) can rob you of success and cost you both time and money. By success I mean being able to get the career you want. Read on for my treatise, "Learn from my mistakes! Part 1 of Infinity."

1) It trains your brain to think critically about the world around you. We use math all the time  and even though you don't think of it as algebra adults use it every day without realizing it. Math isn't just 1+1=x. Math is problem solving and project management. If I have to refinish and stain my deck what supplies will I need? How much stain will I need based on the size of my deck and the age of my deck (will older wood soak up more or less stain)? How should I complete this task (if I just start staining without a plan then I will end up using more stain and it may take longer also)?  Why did Mrs. Heather use this as an example? Because this scenario ACTUALLY happened with a man I know. He dropped out of high school because he had a terrible home life (truly terrible) and no one to help him with his schooling. He joined the military and made a career of it. He's done well but he has a VERY hard time accomplishing tasks and managing projects because his brain never learned math. Psychologists have studied the brain and learning math trains the brain to problem solve. If your brain never learned it and never was used that way then it is incredibly hard to use it for every day problem solving. Not learning math makes this man's every day experiences harder. Now he is learning those things- as a man in his mid-40s.

2) Algebra 1, Algebra 2 and Geometry are the foundation of higher math. If addition/subtraction/multiplication/division are the basement foundation then high school math is the subfloor and frame work for the house. If you try to attach siding or wall board without a frame what happens? Nothing. Yep, nothing. It's impossible. You can try to lean one wall board against another wall board but that's not a house is it? Every year in every college there are students who either change their major after years of investing time and money or they quit. Do you know why? One very real reason is math. Math is required in every college major. Even the majors you wouldn't think use math require it. For example- a criminal justice degree at our local university requires 2 math courses. That's more than just the 'core' math. It requires statistics. In fact, statistics is the main reason I did NOT finish my Psychology degree. I took it twice. I dropped it the first time then managed to get a 'C' the second time but I didn't understand it. I couldn't use it. And that meant I couldn't complete my year long research thesis to get my degree. I was 4 classes away from getting my psychology degree and couldn't do it. This happens all the time. Students show up to college without having mastered the basics of math and they are swamped by college math. My son's math teacher, Mrs. Beverly Locklear, taught math for 14 years in a college and she said every year- EVERY YEAR- she had college seniors in her class who were having to change their major because they couldn't pass the college math required for their major. She said it was almost always because they did not master Algebra and the high school level math courses. They were trying to install wall board without a framework to attach it to.

3) If neither of those reasons seems satisfying to you then ponder this. Sometimes in life....actually, quite often in life, you must complete things that seem pointless or a waste of time but they are required and not doing them will result in serious negative consequences. Filing taxes every year comes to mind. So, to use a rude colloquialism, learn to 'suck it up, buttercup'. In order to get what you want (ie- a high school diploma, a job in the field you want, a pay check, not to be jailed for tax evasion) you have to do stuff you don't like. It's called being a grown up. And your job as an adolescent is to learn how to be functioning, independent grown up.

Still feel like math stinks and it must be an alien language? Then find someone to help you. "The Lord resists the proud and draws near to the humble." Find a tutor. Don't have money for one? The library has them. The online library offers free tutoring. Figure out how to get what you need and don't let something as 'stupid' as math keep you from accomplishing what you were made to do. Stop making excuses and do what needs to be done so you don't end up like the guy in Reason #1 or worse, that guy who is 56 and living in his parents' basement. Harsh? Maybe, but life is harsh.

~Mrs. Heather

I have been teaching history, geography, government and creative learning to other people's children for 10 years and I've been mentoring adolescents and young adults for over 20 years. Every year I am asked, "Why Math?" I am also asked, "Why Humanities (i.e. literature and history)?" This is what I tell parents and students alike. If you struggle with math or struggle teaching math then I will give you this piece of advice that I waited way to long to act on with my own kids. It's pretty big, are you ready? Ask someone for help. Seriously. Get a tutor. Push aside every excuse and get the help you need. That particular piece of advice applies to most things in life.

Re-gifting

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17

 

Sometimes we can look at our lives and think, “What do I have to give? My past? It’s a mess. My present?  Well, it certainly doesn’t look anything like I had planned. How can anything good come of this?”  Or maybe we say, “What qualifications do I have? What in my life could possibly be used by God? There’s nothing special about me. How can I make a difference?” It seems like a logical conclusion. But sometimes we need to shift our perspective. Sometimes the things we see as valueless or even undesirable are actually the very thing God will transform into a gift.

It was my third Christmas and our family had been turned upside down.  Mom and Dad were divorced and my mom’s teenage sister Cheryl was living with us to help her out. We were living half way around the world in Hawaii far from Mom’s family in Connecticut.  The divorce and all the drama that came with it hit my mom hard after her own childhood of abuse, neglect and addiction. A broken, impoverished family was exactly what she did not want to give her daughter for Christmas.

Pictures of her at that time show a 24 year old woman beaten up by life but bravely putting on a smile for her little girl.  The most ‘telling’ picture of that time shows a disheveled preschooler leaning backwards from her mom’s lap as they get ready to swing high into the air on the playground swing set at Immanuel Lutheran Preschool in Wailuku. My upside down smile revealed my giddiness about having mom ‘at school’ with me.  Mom’s brilliant smile doesn’t reveal the despair that her emaciated body does; her collar bone and ribs protruded from beneath her bright red halter dress while her fragile arms and legs pumped with a strength that defied her body’s obvious decay.

 

That December in Hawaii my mom was working multiple waitressing jobs and always made sure the money from her and Dad went into my belly first and the mortgage was always paid.  Sometimes she would open her front door to find care packages of diapers and food left by Saint Nicholas’ elves in the neighborhood. It would be safe to say that calling things ‘tight’ was an understatement.

 

So what’s a broke, divorced twenty-four year waitress to do if she wants to give her curly haired wild child a memorable Christmas?  Enter my Aunt Cheryl.  The two sisters had grown up poor with an abusive alcoholic father and a waitress mother who worked herself to the bone to take care of her four children. They didn’t have anything growing up but poverty has its own unusual gifts to provide- creativity and ‘out of the box’ thinking. And they had a sewing machine. 

 

Mom set to work on turning scraps of fabric into a 6 foot tall patchwork raggedy kitty.  He had a pink triangle face and probably wasn’t really 6 feet tall but he was taller than me and I loved watching my mom work her magic on that sewing machine.  Yep, I saw him before Christmas.  Sneaky Mom told me she was making him for my buddy/nemesis Scotty who lived up the street.  To say I was bummed doesn’t even come close to the disappointment I felt.  I was mad.

 

 “How come Scotty gets the kitty?” I asked resentfully.  

“It’s for Christmas,” she replied without skipping a beat or a stitch. I wanted to storm out of the room but my desire to pet the kitty doll won out.  I thought he was the most beautiful kitty ever. See, Scotty had everything I didn’t. Nice house, lots of toys and a daddy who stayed at his house every night. I pet the kitty wistfully. Mom pumped her foot on the sewing machine pedal and smiled a secret smile.

 

Christmas Eve arrived and I was asleep in my bed. Mr. Kitty was wrapped and placed behind the tree. There wasn’t much else hidden beneath the gaudy tinsel and fat light bulb laden pine but Mom and Aunt Cheryl weren’t done tapping into their deep reserves of divine inspiration.  They set to work wrapping dozens of presents in cheap Christmas paper and newspaper funnies until the living room looked like Scarlet O’Hara’s dress exploded from underneath the Christmas tree.

 

Christmas morning dawned and squeals of delight erupted from me every time I tore open another present. There were dozens of them! And they were all for me. A toaster that looked just like the one in our cabinet! Coffee cups too! Pots and pans to match the ones in the kitchen! It was thrilling. I couldn’t wait to tear apart more paper and make a huge mess without getting into trouble for it. This Christmas thing was a blast. And the gifts kept coming until we ran out of household items.  Mom and Cheryl had succeeded in wrapping up almost the entire contents of the kitchen.  And I was thrilled. 

 

Then in a scene straight from the movie, “A Christmas Story” my mom asked, “What’s that behind the tree?” And there he was- Mr. Kitty! And he was mine! All mine! Too bad Scotty Killam! My mom made this giant kitty for me! It was….the best Christmas ever.

 

In James 1 it says: 2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,  3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.  6 But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  7 That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord;  8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.  9 The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position.  10 But the one who is rich should take pride in his low position, because he will pass away like a wild flower.  11 For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business.  12 Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.  …  16 Don't be deceived, my dear brothers.  17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.  18 He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.

 

See, the truth is that God is the Master Re-gifter. He takes the mundane, the trivial, and the broken and re-gifts it to the world. In some ways we and our lives are not unlike the rejected toys on the Island of Misfit Toys. Where others would look at our brokenness and reject our mess, God says, “this- I can work with.” God says, “Every good and perfect gift comes from me, Your Father of Lights and I will gift you to the world. You are my first fruits that I chose and my truth will shine through you.” He bestows value on us through the very trials we often believe devalue or disqualify us. When we say yes to Him in our mess then we can expect a transformation. He will take the mundane toaster, the mismatched coffee cups, and even the frayed fabric scraps of our life and transform them into a good and perfect gift.